Get Your Stuff Together! How to Hit the Restart Button.

By John fear of rejection, Optimism, Overcome Fear, Self-Care, Self-improvement, True Success

Regretting that you didn’t start earlier is a great distraction from moving on your dream today, and the reality is that today is earlier than tomorrow.
Jon Acuff

Do you suffer from the paralysis of analysis? Are fear and lack of focus and holding you back?
Here is a path you can take to get moving again.

You are going to Get Your Stuff Together startin now!

Step # 1 – Get off your duff, quit making excuses and be brutally and totally honest about what you want. And aim lower! Get your stuff together!
You see you will never write the perfect book.
There will never be a perfect race.
There will never be a perfect idea.
There will never be a perfect relationship.
And you will never be a “perfect Christian,” apart from the finished work that Jesus did for you on the Cross.
There will never be a perfect meal, dessert or car. There will never be an ideal solution.
Why?
Perfection does not exist on this side of heaven.
So, what are you and I supposed to do?
Aim lower, destroy perfection and get something done. (Jon Acuff; Finish)
If you and I tend to set the bar too high, we will do a complete faceplate every time! We will haul off and do nothing and then either blame the world, our parents our ourselves, make excuses and limp off into the sunset.
There is no way we can win squat if we hold ourselves to entirely unrealistic expectations.
So, lower the bar.
If you are a nonfiction author like myself the odds of you becoming a Delia Owens, James Madison, Rachel Hollis, or Dr. Gary Chapman are pretty slim. So, aim lower! Here is a hint that helped me last year when I launched my latest book, The No Fear Entrepreneur, I found a smaller niche. And what happened, on launch day it was the #1 Best Selling Kindle, Paid, Christian Books-Christian Living-Professional Growth.
I had to get myself in a category where I could excel.
Congrats! You survived the first point, I think the most challenging thing to do is to start!

Other things to help Get Your Stuff Together to Move Forward?

Step # 2 Simplify Your Tasks.
The quickest way to do this is by getting more reality-based about how you invest your time.
How about this, rather than spending time on the latest time-saving app, get a small notebook, and jot down how you spend your day. Work on tracking your time use for about a week, and you will begin to get a clearer idea of how you spend your time.
As you keep this simple record, you will begin to discern the ebbs and flows of your days.
By the end of the week you should be able to have a more unobstructed view of how you use your time then you can begin to make some gentle, user-friendly adjustments that will give you more time to do the things you need to do in the nooks and crannies.

Step # 3 Get Your Mental Health Stuff Together.
Did you know that by doing just a little bit of self-care and self-management you can significantly enhance your mental health at absolutely no cost to you?
As a professional counselor for over 35 years, I have a couple of gems for you.
Often one of the best ways of dealing with anxiety-producing situations is to stare them in the face and rip their mask off and see them for what they are. If you fail to do this, you might work yourself into a hissy fit and tie yourself into a useless pile to twisted knots.
This is the type of approach to use when there is some type of kinetic response is required. This type of anxiety means that you either have to stop doing something or start doing something.
Another strategy, which may not feel very intuitive, maybe to hit the pause button and do nothing.
I use this illustration when I am teaching people how to manage their thought life.
Let’s say it is 3 minutes until quitting time and you receive a short email from your boss, it is somewhat ambiguous, short, and he/she wants to see you first thing in the morning.
Now you could get pretty worked up over something like this and even to the point of losing your appetite and missing sleep.
DON’T
The other option – you could sleep on it, pray and meditate on it and see what happens. There is a high probability that it is harmless.

Step # 4 START NOW!

If you need some help getting started email me for a free consult.

Here is a little story from an obscure Old Testament Passage.
31 After Ehud, Shamgar son of Anath rescued Israel. He once killed 600 Philistines with an ox goad. Judges 2:31 NLT
What is the lesson here?
Start where you are.
Use what you have.
Do what you can.
Trust God.

Here are some helpful resources:
Jon Acuff ’s books
Start – Much Fear in the Face and Do Work that Matters
Finish – Give Yourself the Gift of Done
Karen Porter- If You Give a Girl a Giant
Carol Dweck – Mindset
Sarah Knight – Get Your S#*t Together John Thurman- The No Fear Entrepreneur

10 Steps for Surviving a Rough and Tumble World: Part # 2

By John Crisis Leadership, Crisis management, Optimism, Resilience

As I begin this installment of 10 Steps, I wanted to let you know that on I will send out the third installment of 10 Steps Thursday evening and the next three to four blogs will be be very focused on depression, and things you can do to help yourself and others get better. Growing up watching Robin Williams, I am 62 and he was 63, it was very sad to hear about his suicide. While I strongly disagree with how some media outlets went into the gory details of his death. This sad story reminds us of the power of depression. The blogs will not be negative, but will contain principles out of my book, Get a Grip on Depression and out of 35 years of counseling.

Now back to the 10- Steps for surviving, which by the way, are key to pushing back depression and moving forward in life.

4. Practice generosity and kindness – unselfish concern for others, being kind-hearted, philanthropic.

Ephesians 4:31-32 says, “Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you. (NLT)

5. Develop acceptance and cognitive flexibility, meaning the ability to learn and adapt your knowledge and thinking to new situations.

The Apostle Paul illustrated the importance of this principle in Romans 8:38-39.
“I’m convinced that nothing-living or dead, angelic or demonic, today or tomorrow, high or low, thinkable or unthinkable-absolutely nothing can get between us and God’s love because of the way that Jesus our Master has embraced us.” (The Message)

6. Face your fears and learn to control negative emotions.

2 Timothy 1:7, “For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.” (NLT)

Philippians 4:6-8 – “Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus…Fix your thoughts on what is true, honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.” (NLT)

7. Build an ever-expanding tool chest of active coping skills to manage stress.

2 Peter 1:5-7 – “So don’t lose a minute in building on what you’ve been given, complementing your basic faith with good character, spiritual understanding, alert discipline, passionate patience, reverent wonder, warm friendliness, and generous love, each dimension fitting into and developing others. With these qualities active and growing in your lives, no grass will grow under your feet, and no day will pass without its reward as you mature in the experience of our Master Jesus.” (The Message)

I’d love to hear what you think. Feel free to comment.

10 Steps to Surviving a Rough and Tumble World: Part # 1

By John Crisis Management, Gratitude, Optimism, Resilience, Uncategorized

By John H. Thurman Jr., M.Div., M.A. Adapted from The Survivor’s Guide, by Ben Sherwood

Ever wondered what you can do to increase your odds of winning the race of life?

Dr. Dennis Charney is the dean of the Mount Sinai School of Medicine in New York. The fifty-eight-year old is the king of resilient studies in North America. In his years of research and collaboration, he has developed what he calls the Resiliency Prescription. Here is a brief outline of it, as well as some scriptures that support his points.

1. Practice optimism – some people are “born optimists,” others are “trained optimists.” You would think this would be a no-brainer for people of faith. Studies show… The key is to stay positive and hopeful while confronting the reality of a given situation.

Try this little test, take a quick look at this domain name:

www.opportunityisnowhere.com (This is not a real website.)

What did you see? When some people look at this web address, they feel like someone had thrown a wet blanket on them: Opportunity is nowhere. But others see the exact opposite: Opportunity is now here.

This is not being a “Pollyanna,” but is being in a state of mind—a way of thinking and behaving.

The Scripture refers to faith, which can be interpreted as practiced optimism.

Hebrews 11:1 says, “Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives assurance about things we cannot see.” (NLT)

2. Find a resiliency role model – someone who as done it. It can be a biblical character, a historical figure, or someone you look up to.

Once again there are countless illustrations of this principle in the Bible, but the one reference that gives us a short, but focused list is Hebrews 11:3-12:2.

In this portion of Scripture we read of the faith and resiliency of Abel, Enoch, Noah, Abraham, Sarah, Isaac, Jacob, Moses, Rahab, and Jesus. These are all exceptional resiliency models, stories of individuals who overcame significant obstacles to glorify God and others.

3. Develop a moral compass and unbreakable beliefs. The Bible is the ultimate source of truth, and the Ten Commandments are not the Ten Suggestions. It is important to have a solid rock for your belief system.

Joshua 1:7-8 has been a favorite verse of Scripture for millions of Jews and Christians for thousands of years and best summed up the importance of having a moral compass and unbreakable beliefs.

“Be strong and very courageous. Be careful to obey all the instructions Moses gave you. Do not deviate from them, turning to the right or left. Then you will be successful in all that you do. Study this book of instruction continually. Meditate on it day and night so you will be sure to obey everything written in it. Only then will you prosper and succeed in all that you do.” (NLT)

Faith is the most-important part of this. It means that you are learning to trust that God has a plan for your life and will look after you. You have a growing belief that a power bigger than you will guide you through the storms of life. You are learning to see the Lord as an active participant in your life.

Be looking for Part 2 on Wednesday.

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