How to Reset Your Failed New Year’s Resolutions

How to Reset You Failed New Year's Resolutions

STOP!  How are you doing with your resolutions? I hope you are feeling great about them. However, research suggests that most of us are not doing such a good job of maintaining them.

Is it time to reset your failed New Year’s resolutions? We are beginning the second week of January are you feeling hopeful, focused and enriched or hopeless, scattered, dazed and confused?

As we move into what could be an enjoyable and exciting New Year, I thought it would be fun to look at the traditional Top 10 resolutions and then give you some tips on how to be more successful in meeting them.

These are from Statistic Brain.

Lose Weight/Healthier Eating

Life/Self Improvement

Better Financial Decisions

Quit Smoking

Do More Exciting Things

Spend More Time with Family/Close Friends

Work Out More Often

Learn Something New On My Own

Do More Good Deeds For Others

Find The Love Of My Life

NEWS FLASH! According to Statistic Brain, the average American has a 9.2 percent chance of keeping them.

But don’t lose hope! I am going to show you how to reset your failed New Year’s Resolutions.

Here is the 4 Question Tool that will help you reset your failed New Year’s Resolutions.

In reviewing 2019, resist the temptation to overthink 2019.

Instead, ask:

What did I do right?

What did I do wrong?

What can I do better?

What did I/we do, right?

I want you to really drill into this and think about what you did right in 2019. What can you celebrate from this past year? Think about your personal, relational, and professional life. Take some time to review, celebrate, and express genuine gratitude for the positive things that you were able to accomplish. Spend twice as much time answering this question as to the next.

What did I/we do wrong?

Be very careful and proceed with caution when you answer this question. I would not want you to suffer from the paralysis of analysis.

Dolly Parton says, “I thank God for my failures. Maybe not at the time but after some reflection. I never feel like a failure just because something I tried has failed.”

So, take half of the time you spent reviewing what you did right to reflect and list what you did wrong. 

This way, you can honestly look at the missteps, call them what they are, and take corrective action.

This leads me to the next question, which is the key to having a better year in 2020!

What can I/we do better?

This, I believe, is the most crucial step you can take! After celebrating the victories, acknowledging the lost opportunities and missteps, no, it is time to begin laying out a definite action plan.

A few days ago, I was on Facebook and saw a message that one of my friends had posted, and it got me thinking. The quote said:

You are not born a winner. You are not born a loser. You are born a chooser! So choose wisely!

The key to making and keeping resolutions is to have Sustainable Motivation and Energy.  How do you do that? The key is to be clear about what you want and why you want it. When you understand your “what” and “why,” you will increase the odds of being able to experience success with resolutions.

Michelle Segar, from the University of Michigan’s Center for Positive Organization, has developed a practical way of streamlining this process.

Segar suggests four action steps to begin applying the Right Why to changes you want to make in 2020:

#1: Reflect

Consider your “whys” for initiating a lifestyle change, and ask yourself if it has symbolized that this change/behavior is a chore or a gift?

#2: Reset

Know that we’ve all been socialized to think about a “healthy” lifestyle from the same perspective, one that has turned them into medicine instead of the vehicles of joy and meaning that they indeed are. Let go of any sense of personal failure because the formula we’ve been taught sets us up for starting and stopping but not sustaining. People feel like failures, and this isn’t very good for motivation.

#3: Choose

Consider the specific experiences, that if you had more of them in your day, would lead you to feel better and drive greater success in your roles. Do you feel drained and need more energy? Do you need more time to connect with loved ones? Then pick one of these experiences – this is what the right Why is – and identify what lifestyle behavior might deliver it to you. It’s essential to focus on changing one behavior at a time because the goal is to institutionalize it into our lives. Humans have a limited capacity for decision making, so we must strategically use it as the scarce resource it truly is.

#4: Experiment

Experiment with a plan for one week to see what happens. Be mindful of the types of things that get in the way. Plan a date on your schedule to sit down and evaluate whether that behavior helped you realize your right. Why and also what you might want to tweak going forward. Because it’s an opportunity to learn, there is no failure. It’s about continuing to experiment with whys and ways to achieve them until you discover what works for you.  From Sustainable Motivation for New Year’s Resolutions, by Chris White.

Here is an ancient text to consider as you move into the New Year. It is found in Proverbs 3:5-6

Trust in the LORD with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take. Proverbs 3:5-6 NLT

I hope that 2020 is a year filled with opportunity, hope, and joy. I also hope that this next decade will be filled with blessings, growth, and peace.

Be sure to subscribe to my update as I will be giving you 10 tools you can use to have an Outstanding 2020!

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I don’t know about you, but I am ready to move into the new normal!

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