People make all manner of resolutions this time of year, and for your reading pleasure and entertainment here is a list of the Top Ten Resolutions for 2014 that was published by Dr. John Norcross in the University of Scranton’s Journal of Psychology in January 1, 2014.
Here were the Top Ten for Last Year.
1. Loose Weight
2. Getting Organized
3. Spend Less, Save More
4. Enjoy Life to the Fullest
5. Staying Fit and Healthy
6. Learn something exciting
7. Quite Smoking
8. Helping other in Their Dreams
9. Fall in Love
10. Spend More Time with Family
The study showed that 45% of Americans usually make New Year’s Resolutions
39% of people in their twenties reported achieving their resolutions each year. While only 14% of people over 50 carried out their resolutions each year.
I was surprised ant the length of the Resolutions
- Resolutions maintained for the first week 75%
- Past two Weeks 71%
- Past one month 64%
- Past six months 46%
Dr. John Norcross, a researcher and psychology professor at the University of Scranton, is an international expert on how people change addictive behaviors. For the past 30 years, he has studied people who have quit smoking, cut back or stop drinking, lost weight including those whose change began with a New Year’s resolution. Here are some of his strategies.
First, believe it is possible. Norcross’s research shows that between 40% and 46% of the New Year’s resolvers will be successful at six months.
Second, keep it real. Don’t mix fantasy and reality. Resolutions are supposed to be well defined, realistic, and measurable.
Third, sweat. Do the work you need to do to make the changes. A resolution without a clear, plan is a waste of time and energy.
Fourth, develop resistance. You will have some slip ups, setbacks, and disappointments. Norcross’s research revealed that the majority of resolvers (71%) reported that their first slip up strengthened their resolve. Slip ups do not have to end up as a fall or a reason to quit. Rather, develop resistance by knowing setbacks will come and have a plan in place to either deal with them or work around them.
Fifth, be persistent and have some accountability partners that will help you stay on track.
With these pointers in mind here are three of the most common New Years resolutions for Relationships.
1. Be more affectionate – Hug, kiss, cuddle before you go to bed. Hugs and kisses of 20 seconds or more have been shown to decrease blood pressure, heart rate, and stress. Science reports that the primary benefit is due to he release of oxytocin, the body’s natural relaxation hormone.
2. Have tech-free times, say between 8:00 and 10:00 p.m. or a tech free day once a week. When you do this, you may discover that treating your partner like a living, breathing, warm person could be more rewarding than a Facebook™ friend.
3. Increase your sexual intimacy. Most men want more sexual intimacy, and most women want more emotional intimacy. Maybe if we looked at relationship more like a series of “trades” this area might be better for all of us. Men tend to be more emotionally intimate and vulnerable around the times of sexual intimacy. Women tend to desire more sexual intimacy when they have been experiencing emotional intimacy. Why not try to trade more of these in 2015.
On Tuesday evening I will give you five additional tips for reaching your goals and keeping your resolutions.