For those of us who’ve lost a parent or family member, particularly around the holidays, this time of year can have some rough patches as we remember our loved ones.
In December of 2015, I received a call from my sister that my mom, Mary Anne Thurman, had breathed her last breath. As a Jesus Follower, I took comfort in the fact that I believe that when she took her last breath on this Earth, she took her next breath in Heaven. That being said, her death began a new journey for me, my siblings, my dad, and my family.
Grief is not a neat, predictable, or orderly process. It is messy, sometimes unpredictable, and rarely follows the handy, five or six-step path that some folks espouse.
It is also intensely personal and unique for all of us.
And while each of us processes the loss of a loved one in very different and unique ways, I choose to celebrate some of the good memories of my mom.
One way I celebrate her is by preparing one of her favorite Christmas recipes each Year.
First, a bit of backstory: I left home to attend military school when I was 15, and, apart from a few years in the late seventies and early eighties, I have lived away from my family.
Since I was not home for most Christmases of my adult life, Mom would always make sure I received a care package close to Christmas. It usually included fruit cake cookies and Martha Washington Candy. (Here is a great link that gives the story of MWC.
Over the years, I would call mom and ask for some of my favorite recipes, and a few years ago, she sent all of us a box of handwritten recipes. The photo at the bottom is the one for Mom’s Martha Washington Candy. (NOTE: Oleo is an old school name for margarine; use butter that is at room temperature instead.)
Every year, as I begin to pull out that special recipe box, gentle memories of my mom, dad, siblings, and Christmases past slowly trickle through my mind.
At the same time, I think about the 47 Christmases with my wife, the 37 years as a parent, and now as a grandparent. I am thankful for the life I have.
May your Christmas be filled with joy and precious memories as we celebrate the first coming of Christ the King.
Helpful Links:
4 Pitfalls Chrstians’ Should Avoid. Blog
How to Manage Grief During the Holidays – Blog
Well stated John. I never really knew my Dad but my Mom is still with us. I have lost siblings, Grandparents and a spouse. I know of course, one day I will have that loss to bear, my Mom will breathe her last and as I watch my friends navigate this loss, I still can’t fathom it in my own life. But come it will. My only hope of bearing such loss is clinging to Jesus and the love and support of my adult kids, my husband and my church family. I love that you’ve included a recipe from your Mom! Wouldn’t it be awesome to make a cookbook with “ All Mom’s Recipes “ and everyone contribute a favorite recipe or two from their Mom’s recipes? I’m already searching for one to share!
Merry Christmas John & Family